The Damn Problem with Swimming...and then Open Water Swimming

1. You must be able to coordinate your hands and feet.  If you're like me, you're skrewed.

2. You must be able to get over your fear. There will always be weird things down there.  You will see them. And you can't do jack shit about them.  Just swim faster.

3. You must be able to tread water well. For at least a min.  So that if there are no tyres, or strings or anything to catch hold of, you can still take a breather and not flail your arms around like a drowning chicken. (Wait... do chickens drown?)

4. If you can't tread water well, you must be able to swim non-stop for at least 750m.  There is normally something big like the big buoy where we will U-turn at,  and hope that it is anchored properly, so you can catch it and hold on to it to take a breather.

5. If you can't tread water and you can't swim non-stop, then please sign up for the minimum distance there is in the list of categories. Try novice super sprint at 400m. Then practice 8 laps non-stop.

6. There's too many coaches or instructors who will tell you different things for the same thing. Find what you're comfortable with and stick with it.

7. Try to simulate the next race's swimming conditions.  That's why they say get into the water earlier and feel the water. Too much shit to simulate if you ask me.

8. Try as many open water swims as possible so you can get used to the bobbing around in the water and not feel sick on race day.

9. There will always be an idiot behind who is trying to catch your legs. Maybe he is drafting you. Maybe he ate too much pasta from the night before and woke up blind and just can't see you. Either way, keep kicking hard so that he moves to the left or right and buggers off.

10. What you can FINALLY do in the swimming pool doesn't guarantee whether you can do the same out there. Especially when you're a beginner like me.  Wake up early,  say the correct prayers and hope for the best.

Added on today at 7:52am

11.  Don't listen to the kayaker who will come up beside you and starts telling you stuff like "There's no point killing yourself over the swim and you can't bike and run later.  Just finish this one lap. It's a good experience"  No matter how much you're struggling, just force yourself to continue. Cos once you stop, they'll pull you out and that will be the biggest regret you will ever make.  It's not their job to make sure you make it.  It's their job to make sure there are no dead bodies.

12. Don't let anyone unzip your wet suit and take you into the ambulance van.  Fight for your right to dive back into the water.

13. They always tell you to make sure you're doing a high elbow. But I saw the leading man in men's vet just using brute force, swinging his arms as fast as he can.  He sure as hell wasn't doing high elbows and his head was high above water the whole time.   He still was first.

14. During training in the swimming pool, it's you against your class mates. During race day, it's you against yourself.  Don't panic just because the rest of the swimmers are like 25m ahead of you.  You can catch them later during the bike and run.  If you panic, you will lose everything. Your strokes. Your rhythm. Your buoyancy.  Everything.

15. When you get to the venue on race day,  plan your thoughts on how you're gona get through the swim. Stare at the swim course. Look at the shape.  Strategise.  If you dive in blindly,  you're also gona swim blindly.

16. Practice as much sighting as possible.  So that you don't have to keep stopping to look where you're going.

17.  There will always be another idiot swimming up beside you and jostling you around cos he wants to be ahead. If he disturbs your strokes, let it be,  just keep stroking.  The more agitated you are, the more you can't concentrate on your next stroke.

18. Keep calm. No matter what happens. Keep calm.  It's the one thing that will keep you from drowning.